Random Archives

I read the following sentence and immediately my eyes bulged and my head exploded. From CNN:

NARITA, Japan (AP) -- The Dalai Lama said he supports China's hosting of the Summer Olympics on Thursday, but insisted that nobody had the right to tell protesters demanding freedom for Tibet "to shut up."

Unless I'm missing a vital piece of information, I don't think the Summer Olympics are being held on Thursday. Why do trivial mistakes in syntax and sentence formation drive me nuts?

Posted by di at 08:54 AM | Filed under: Geeky , Minutae , Random |Permalink

It's a Suzuki Burgman 400 and gets 55-65 mpg. He's loving it! His ultimate plan is to sell the Miata and get a small truck. He knows he needs a vehicle a bit more practical than the Miata, but he also wanted to have something fun and good on gas. This was the answer.

Posted by di at 03:01 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

I saw an episode of 20/20 recently which focused on luck and whether it was a real thing. Part of the interview focused on the characteristics of people considered lucky because of events that had unfolded in their lives. In general, they said statistics show that people who believe they are lucky actually are luckier than most. It's just a matter of positive thinking, they said. It helps you create opportunities for yourself and can even help you find or discover money.

They showed a tape where money had been left lying in a parking lot, and how it was the people who consider themselves lucky and who are open to possibilities (positive thinking!) who saw the money lying there and got it.

I know, right? It's a pretty awesome thing. By using my brain, I can score some cold, hard cash.

So I decided I'd start some positive thinking and create some monetary opportunities for myself. I'm amazed to say that the system works! In the three weeks since I've seen the episode, I've found 5 cents in pennies on the ground in random parking lots. FIVE CENTS. in pennies. on the ground.

Three of them were on heads.

Perhaps I'm not thinking hard enough. Or being open enough. In fact, in regard to positive thinking, my results show that I may be downright uptight and not open to anything. However, positive thinking leads me to believe that I should keep trying. Because I know I'm a lucky person.

Posted by di at 08:38 AM | Filed under: Random , Spirit |Permalink

I saw this message from TwitLit on Twitter today and instantly had a thought about it. But the book the post links to turned out to be something completely different than what I was thinking it may be.

Welcome to the gutter with your host Diane!

Posted by di at 07:50 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

I have an unusual habit. I read mommy blogs quite a bit, yet the only thing I have in common with most of the women who write these blogs is that we're all mothers. My children are mostly grown. Theirs are mostly under the age of 5. My son will be 24 and my daughter will be 17 this year - memories of breastfeeding and diapers faded from view a long time ago. I guess I admire who these women are. Perhaps it isn't so weird for me to observe their shared lives, as they now are me, once.

These days I find myself looking forward to the next phase of my life. I want some of what I gave up in my 20s. I missed that decade of freedom that is a rite of passage for most. I traded it for motherhood and getting married to a man who wasn't meant to be my forever. Now that I've found a relationship that works for me and a man who nurtures who I am, I'm ready to become more of the women I envision myself to be. This is an awesome gift.

I am becoming. My life is being redefined every minute that I move towards the person who I've often thought about... that person who gave up a scholarship to college and instead opted for marriage and a family... that person who followed her dreams of becoming a writer... that woman who found a stronger calling with technology and the internet... that person who still wonders a lot about what tomorrow holds for her and what she'll become.

In September, I turn 40. This fall, I am going back to school because I want to experience more of what this world has to offer me. I will take more risks and push myself to grow. I will listen and trust my intuition. I will remember that I am a creator and that anything is possible for my life and for me.

Edge pieces, completed. Now it's time to work on the middle of the puzzle.

Posted by di at 08:08 PM | Filed under: Children , Random , Spirit |Permalink

So, my daughter randomly asked me a couple of weeks ago, "Why do people keep a journal on their website? Like, why do YOU do that?" And I responded with, "Because I can," because that's just the type of thing I like to say to my child. I later explained to her that it's just a different medium for writing. It's a book, published on the web for the world to see. I also explained that my blog is less of a journal these days and more of a random compilation of crap in my brain that needs to be purged.

However, since that conversation, I've really wondered what has become of my blog and why I walked away from doing the self-expression thing on the web. For me, I think this blog - if that's what you want to call it - serves the purpose of being a sounding board for me. Ever since I've had a website, I've had a sounding board. It's just that the posts during the demise of my first marriage and my angst with life were far more interesting than the posts these days that really say a whole lot of nothing. And that's fine with me. I tend not to force myself to type words if I don't feel the urge.

So that's my take on blogging. I thought you'd want to know.

Posted by di at 08:59 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

I've been debating creating a new category called Words That Jon Makes Up because inevitably when we're talking about something, Jon will take two words from the conversation and combine them to form a new word. Often the new word doesn't make a lot of sense. I told him if he kept it up I'd have to blog about it, so here I am blogging about it. Yay for mental retardation!

Tonight's words:

• Blingatch - a watch with bling
• Peachoake - peanut butter chocolate cake

And while I'm at it, I should take a moment and wish Jon a happy birthday! (Hapday!)

Posted by di at 07:42 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

This week I have managed to pull jeans out of the dirty clothes basket on three separate occasions to wear to work. I am not quite sure how it happened that all three pair of jeans that I wear (I own many more in many different sizes) ended up dirty, but they did. Laundry awaits my attention, and soon I'll have all clean and crisp jeans to wear to work.

Lately, I've been dressing up in slacks more often than not because I've been managing a project that requires a lot of interaction with faculty and staff. It feels good to dress up for work again; I realize now that I was falling deep into a slump of "who cares what I wear to work because I just sit at a computer all day anyway." But this week was different - I only had a training class on Monday and the rest of the week has been spent at my desk doing some catch up work. Oh yeah, and some surfing. And some mudding. And general slacking off. It's been great!

I couldn't sleep last night, so I watched TV in the living room for a little while. When I looked up and saw the time, I realized something was wrong with me because it was 3:30 a.m. and I wasn't the least bit tired. So much for drinking two tall glasses of iced tea with dinner. That'll teach me! It was sometime after 4 when I finally managed to fall asleep and around 6:30 when I got out of bed to shower. I'm now comtemplating taking a 1/2 day of vacation, though it may be just as good to sit here in my numb-like state, contemplating the cleanliness of my jeans and writing blog entries about it.

Posted by di at 08:12 AM | Filed under: Random , Work |Permalink

Hell is wearing a pair of slacks that have a faulty zipper. Hell is going into the bathroom and trying to unzip said pants and not being able to. Hell is jumping around in the bathroom, struggling with the faulty zipper and trying not to alert coworkers of faulty zipper. Hell is being the instructor of a training class on the very same day when you're wearing a pair of pants with a faulty zipper - not to mention that you also have to urinate.

Damn you, faulty zipper gods!

Posted by di at 02:25 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

It was cool when I stepped outside this morning. I thought twice about going back inside to change from flipflops closed-toe shoes and putting on a light jacket. Then I remembered that in a couple of hours it would be hot out and I'd regret it.

Currently, I am at work and can't complain about the temperature in the office. I halfway expected my office partner to have the heat on. We're opposites when it comes to our body temperatures, so in the winter I have to fight the waves of heat as I open the door that she has so carefully shut so as to warm up the space quickly. So far so good.

I'm ready for fall. Transitional weather brings change, and change is good!

Posted by di at 08:30 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

Hearing about how my boss's sweat gland on the left side of his neck is overacting because of the surgery he had last week to remove a benign mass from behind his ear. As you sit there and talk to him, you notice his collar becoming wet and you think to yourself that it really can't get much grosser than that.

Then he tells you about how when he eats the sweat drips into his food and he's at a loss to control it.

Why must he share these things with his staff?

Posted by di at 08:44 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

I suck at blogging during those times when I don't feel like posting or figure that I have nothing interesting to say. There isn't much going on in my life, but there are a few notables:

• Bought a new king-sized bed. Have slept in it one night. I like the space, but I didn't sleep well due to a sore muscle in my neck ache that I acquired prior to getting the bed. I expect to enjoy it more in the coming months/years/etc.
• We bought a treadmill. Jon is walking. Casey is walking. I'm still working out at Curves and haven't walked yet, but I expect to. It's good having an option for exercise indoors in the hot summer months.
• My pants are fitting better these days. I have increased fiber intake and more physical output to thank for this!
• Being a parent of a teenager isn't easy. Especially a grounded teenager.
• I have upcoming Tori Amos concerts to attend! TWO of them! One on August 13 in Cary, NC and the other on August 19 in Holmdel, NJ. Jackie and Todd will be joining me for the NJ show. Yay!

I should be returning to my work now. Lots of fun stuff going on now with students returning in a couple of weeks. Peace out.

Posted by di at 10:50 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

Kristi and Kenny and I are on the phone as we speak (Kenny just left the office), and they are coming to visit in May. Yay! I love visiting with family, especially those guys!

This constitutes a blog entry. I really will get back into this. Much to do regarding web and I have to stop being slack.

Love,
di

p.s. Hi Kristi and Kenny!

Posted by di at 12:42 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (2)

I'm too tired to capitalize and punctuate correctly, but here's a brief recap of the last week and a few days of my life:

• sunday, march 20 - went to king's dominion with casey and alison. had a great time. became greatly aware of how much energy 14-year-olds have in comparison to me. again decide that riding rollercoasters is great fun and i should do more of it.
• monday, march 21 - met my mother and stepfather at a local restaurant to drop casey off with them for the week. jon also met us there. we enjoyed a nice dinner and then went home to a quiet, empty house and promptly relaxed because there was no energetic 14-year-old there to drive us nuts. yay us!
• tuesday, march 22 - jon and i played hooky from work. we both called in sick and enjoyed our day off together, doing much of nothing. totally relaxing, totally cool. we should do this more often.
• wednesday, march 23 - jon and i returned to work, but we met later at outback steakhouse to enjoy dinner with our friend pete before returning home for jon's gaming night. i spent a quiet evening in the bedroom doing much of nothing and enjoying it. oh how i love breaks from life.
• thursday, march 24 - i picked up casey after work from my parent's house and returned home. i feel exhausted, though there's really no reason for it.
• friday, march 25 - casey gets picked up by her father for their weekend together. i spend the day doing laundry and preparing for our weekend jaunt to the beach, where i am slated to work for my dad at the big oak. we go out to dinner, return home to watch This Is Spinal Tap (it was bad movie night), and go to bed by 11:30 or so.
• saturday, march 26 - we get up at 6:30 a.m., shower and dress and leave for the beach by 7:45. we get there at 10:55, just in time for me to work at 11. i work until 3, and then return at 5 and work until 8. i return to dad's house, shower and crash hard.
• sunday, march 27 - we get up by 8 or so, shower and prepare to go to breakfast with my father and stepmother. pancakes! i love pancakes and enjoy them for breakfast. i work from 11-3, and then jon and i drive home. we spend the rest of the evening relaxing.
• monday, march 28 - i return to work, but spend most of the day reading blogs and surfing the net. casey gets dropped off at my work and spends the afternoon at work with me. we leave near 5 p.m., head to the bank and to get gas and then meet jon at the mexican restaurant for dinner. on the way home, i have plans to stop by the grocery store to get some milk and bread, but i notice that i have one headlight out. so i return home to fix it, only to realize i don't have the correct bulb. so jon leaves with me, we go to pep boys to get a replacement bulb and some parts he needs to wire up his keyless entry for his car. i fix the headlight easily, and we return home without going by the grocery store because i have to pee REALLY bad and i don't feel like hovering in a public bathroom. i spend the night doing our taxes and seeing how we'd fare if we filed married filing separately. i realize we owe $51 less if we file jointly. we only end up owing $125 overall on our taxes. we're pleased, as we were thinking it would be more.
• tuesday, march 29 - here i am. i find myself thinking blogs are passé and that episodes would be so much cooler in the way of having a website. i miss the old days of the internet when everything was original. i decide that it's time to stop doing this entry and go put on my makeup in the bathroom here at work.

Posted by di at 08:19 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

I discovered soon after the post yesterday that they are in fact cactus leaves and are called napoles. Jon and I have discussed it and we've decided we're going to try and make something with napoles soon. It should prove to be interesting.

I love it when I learn something new.

Posted by di at 08:33 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

The other day Jon and I stopped in the grocery store to pick up a few items that we needed. I was searching for romaine lettuce in the produce area when Jon called out to me from a nearby produce stand.

"You've got to come see this," he said. I joined him in front of a display of what appeared to me to be cactus leaves.

"What are those?" I asked.

"I don't know," he replied. "I was hoping you would know because I don't see any sign that tells me what they could be."

They were sitting right next to the baby pineapples, so I suggested that maybe they were some sort of leaf relating to the pineapples. Jon told me that couldn't be right. So, smart me, I picked one of the cactus leaf looking things up to get a feel for it and to smell it, and then found a nearby produce department worker who also couldn't tell me what it was. Before I knew it, one of the prickly bits was stuck in my finger and I started crying out in pain. "This damn thing attacked me!" I said. Jon became amused, and so did a lady standing nearby. IT WASN'T FUNNY! All I could think was WHAT IS THIS DAMN THING AND WHY IS IT ATTACKING ME?

So imagine my amusement today when I picked up a copy of The Independent Weekly and inside the front cover was a big picture of the cactus-leaf-looking-things. AHA! I thought to myself. Now the mystery will be solved. On top of the photo was the page number of the related article, so I turned to the article and searched for the answer. THEY DIDN'T MENTION THE CACTUS LEAF LOOKING THINGS AT ALL!

So I took a picture in the hope that someone out there on this great world wide web could tell little ol' ignorant me (who never claimed to know much of anything anyway) what the hell these are:

My guess now, given that they were tied to a story about Latino restaurants, is that they are used in Latino cooking somehow. I'm really interested in knowing what they are, what types of dishes they are part of and how the hell you handle them without injuring yourself.

Posted by di at 01:22 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

This morning I was sitting at work, diligently working away (ha!) and listening to my iPod when I realized that it was raining hard outside and the wind was howling. So I took off the headphones, stood at the window and just stared in amazement as the trees across the field behind our building were being whipped around and the rain was blowing sideways. And then it began to hail. Hail! It's the closest we've gotten to icy precip all winter, it seems. Soon after, there was thunder and lightning and just about everyone in the department was moving about and commenting on the weather.

You know it's bad when the weather is the highlight of your day at work.

Posted by di at 11:11 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

I thought it would be fun to do an entire post of my day's events. This is semi-real-time blogging in effect, people! Check it out!

7:49 a.m. I arrive at work with a bagel, orange juice and a cup of ice. I need the ice for the Diet Pepsi I have open on my desk from yesterday afternoon. Office partner (OP) informs me that she has Krispy Kreme doughnuts if I want one. I definitely want one. I can hear my ass getting wider.

8:25 a.m. I realize that I don't have any photos here at work and write an entry about it in this blog. Boring!

8:47 a.m. I chat with Jon in our talk session about some monster cables or s-video cables that a coworker needs to hook up her new HDTV to DirectTV. He has agreed to swing by her place this evening after work to get it all hooked up for her. She's happy. Jon is a nice guy, I remind myself.

8:59 a.m. I go into the bathroom at work and apply makeup and brush my teeth. Bits of the herb from the light herb garlic cream cheese that I had on my bagel has ended up wedged in between my teeth. I determine that since my dentist visit on the 2nd that I'm doing a much better job with brushing during the day and with flossing in general. I don't want anymore negative comments from the hygienist about my inability to floss properly. (Bitch)

9:05 a.m. I start work on converting two forms on the web server to feed into a database instead of having results sent through email. Such fun. I love having brainless work to complete on a Friday morning. Seriously. It beats actually having to think.

9:16 a.m. I toggle over to naim (AIM) and talk to Scott. We firm up our lunch plans. I'm taking him to lunch because he had a birthday last week and was sick. We're going to Firehouse Subs in Cary. Yum!

9:35 a.m. I finish my orange juice. Not from concentrate!

9:42 a.m. Scott points me at this page. We laugh because we've always tried to be l337 like that when we type. I used to work with Scott at Interpath, back when it existed. Ahh, the good ol' days. We 0\/\/n3d that place!

9:43 a.m. Don't I have some forms I should be working on?

9:44 a.m. I walk to Johnson Hall with OP. We cut through the dorms in a vague attempt to stay warm. There's a girl sitting in the hall, in her pajamas and a coat, reading a book. We discuss outloud whether we're bothering the girl by talking. We continue to talk about the fact that we're sure we're not bothering the girl or making her think we're weird as we walk by her, talking about her. She makes a slight smile and then pretends to be very interested in her book. I feel like antagonizing her further, but we keep walking.

9:59 a.m. A coworker asks if I'd like to go to Moe's today for lunch. I inform her that I already have plans. I like Moe's, though! Welcome to Moe's!

10:05 a.m. I realize that I've done nothing but talk about food today. No wonder I'm struggling with weight loss.

10:39 a.m. Good headway on the forms. The mySQL table has been created and I'm tweaking the script that will feed into it.

11:10 a.m. Script still being tweaked. I take a break and surf around on craigslist for awhile and find this. I become amused because they should have rotated the picture or changed the title to include the words "Lots of Starch" or "I'm an idiot because I didn't rotate this picture." Even so, I contemplate a new fashion statement by wearing a white lab coat over my usual clothes.

1:06 p.m. Went to lunch with Scott and had a good time. Haven't seen him in awhile, and we talked about braces (he has them, my daughter may get them), insurance costs and consumer credit. He's doing okay for a guy who has three kids and is raising them by himself for the most part. On the way back from lunch, I received a call from the eye doctor that our contacts were in, so I stopped by there and grabbed those. Also stopped and got gas. I heard yesterday that gas prices are about to sharply increase, so I think I'll read up on that today.

1:20 p.m. I contemplate whether the refresh button in my rss reader in Firefox is making me obsessive compulsive because I click it so much or if I click it so much because I'm already obsessive compulsive.

1:35 p.m. I discuss with Scott the many different types of Girl Scout cookies that I want to buy from him (er, his daughter, technically) the next time we have lunch, which I'm hoping will be next week. This is the first time in many years that I haven't had someone at work who was selling GS Cookies for their kid. Amazing!

1:45 p.m. A coworker has requested that I create a web publishing account for her and show her the ins and outs of publishing. So I do that, chat with her a few minutes, make small talk with other coworkers and return to my desk. I realize I need to pee but I'm too lazy to get up right now and go back across the building.

1:53 p.m. I spend a few minutes trying to figure out the correct spelling of the new category I've just added called "Minutae," because I figured this entry fit nicely into that category. I typed in "define minutae" into Google and it said "did you mean define minutiae? So apparently that is how you spell it, but I think I like my version better. Minutae! Someone else has a category named this too, so what the fuck, you know? I like minutae!

2:05 p.m. I finally go pee. And I brush my teeth. And I wash my hands. Hygiene? Check!

2:26 p.m. My "easy" script from this morning appears not to be working. Heh. I suck.

2:27 p.m. SJ has a picture of a poorly drawn (but large!) penis on her page. FYI.

3:11 p.m. Stupid form!

3:43 p.m. Okay, the stupid form has stopped kicking my ass now. I won't even BEGIN to tell you how stupid my error was. Thank gosh it's Friday! Yeehaw.

4:09 p.m. Man, I'm starting to get really tired. I think I'll leave at 4:30 and go work out. Then we're going out to eat. Then we're going over to my coworker's house to hook up her new television. Then it's RELAXATION TIME! Yay.

4:26 p.m. OP is leaving and so am I. I think that's about it for awhile. Have a great weekend!

Posted by di at 04:26 PM | Filed under: Minutae , Random |Permalink

Posted by di at 09:09 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (3)

Yesterday, Raleigh experienced a freak snow storm and it resulted in our state's governor declaring Wake County under a state of emergency. No joke. When it snows in North Carolina, everything stops.

I was at lunch yesterday with Jon when the snow started falling. Doing what I do best, I marked up my car with the appropriate jdi wording:

There you have it. Proof of me being a geeky idiot in the snow.

We followed lunch by a quick trip to Wal-Mart. When we were putting our bags into the car, Jon made the comment that he thought he was going to head home because the roads looked bad. So he exited left, I exited right. Minutes later, he called to tell me he had been in an accident in the Miata. It slid through an intersection and into another car, and immediately afterward another car slid into him. No airbags were deployed and no one was injured, but Jon's car has been declared a total loss by the insurance company.

Thankfully, we have the truck as a great backup vehicle in the event something like this should happen. It really sucks that the Miata is no longer, but I expect we'll get something very similar to replace it soon enough. Jon spent the evening perusing through cars online while trying to make himself feel better.

More snow tonight, they say! I can only imagine what's in store. All I can say is that my Mac Mini better be delivered before they close down roads and stop all modes of transportation. I don't mind being stuck at home as long as I have new Apple products keeping me warm.

Posted by di at 11:39 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

I spent a couple of hours last night working on adding an "about" page to this website so that people coming here would know where they were, what this site is about and where I've been before. It sort of makes a lot of sense to include background info for readers, otherwise you don't know who the players are. Check it out! I AM A PLAYER!

Heh.

Posted by di at 01:37 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

In no particular order, here is what I'm setting out to do in 2005:

1. Love my husband more and more.
2. Lose 30 pounds.
3. Get fit while losing 30 pounds by strength training and working out.
4. Paint several walls in our house.
5. Work on bettering the relationship I have with my daughter.
6. Travel more.
7. Work on my PHP programming skills.

Posted by di at 09:13 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

We've had a busy holiday so far, and tonight - well, tomorrow morning - we're heading to Syracuse for a week.

In the meantime, my favorite cat in the whole wide world wanted to send out a special holiday greeting while she still had the chance. Here ya go, Raz.

Posted by di at 09:22 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

But take a picture!

In the foreground is my iBook G4 (the diBook). In the background is a portion of my Christmas tree.

What do you think of my holiday photo?

Posted by di at 04:30 AM | Filed under: Geeky , Random |Permalink | Comments (2)

How many Friday nights do I have to sit here doing things alone before I get the hint that he's otherwise preoccupied and won't be spending any time with me AGAIN?

Posted by di at 11:26 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

I woke up, turned over and hit the key on my laptop that turns up the backlight on the display. I refreshed the election results page to see how close the presidential race had gotten since I went to bed. Bush had 254 to Kerry's 252 electoral votes, and three states not decided yet. I knew then that the day had already turned to shit.

I hit the alarm a minute or two later when it went off and got out of bed.

I showered alone. I wish Jon had gotten up with me this morning, because I find that the small amount of time we spend together some mornings really helps put me in a better frame of mind for the rest of my day. But he slept in, and I showered and dressed and left home early.

Outside, it was dull and overcast. And muggy. I really hate fucking muggy weather. Makes me want to move out of this stupid state (that gave its precious 15 electoral votes to Bush).

I stopped by McDonald's as usual, got my bacon, egg and cheese biscuit meal (I never eat the biscuit) with a medium Diet Coke, and I drove away. It was later that I noticed that those motherfuckers must have run out of the Monopoly game piece hash brown holders because I had a plain one. It's the only reason I get the meal, dammit! (For what it's worth, they also build their bacon, egg and cheese biscuits incorrectly. How is a carb-conscious person supposed to get all of the contents of the biscuit away from the biscuit WHEN THE CHEESE IS STUCK TO THE FUCKING BISCUIT? Do it differently, I say: first bacon, then cheese, then egg. Then the contents are stuck together and I'm not driving down the road like a maniac trying to peel cheese.) Figures.

I got to work before my office partner, so I turned on my halogen lamp and enjoyed the dim quietness of my office. Then she walked in, flipped on the flourescent lights and began talking. Shut. The. Fuck. Up. CAN'T YOU SEE I'M IN A BAD MOOD? We're good enough friends that I should have been able to say that to her, but I only managed to sit here quietly and sulk.

Yes, the world should revolve around me, dammit. Don't ask yourself stupid questions like that.

"I need a hug," I later wrote to Jon in our talk session. He told me he'd give me extra hugs at lunch. I found myself looking forward to that.

Lunchtime greatly improved my mood. We went to Baja Fresh and I loaded up on their fresh Pico de Gallo salsa that I on my Burrito Mexicano (that included steak, black beans, and hot salsa). Jon and I talked about increasing our homeowners insurance and enjoyed our meal. We then walked to Wal-Mart, where I bought multipacks of gum and chocolate candy.

mmmmmmmmmmmmm... Reisen. Reisen is love, my friends. Pure, hot passionate love that ends up in your mouth. Take that however you want. It's all good.

And then Jon hugged me before we left to return to our jobs. That changed my mood for a very short period of time.

At 2 p.m. EST, Kerry will officially concede. It's a sad, sad day for America. Or is that "Amuhrca"? It's just lovely when our President can't pronounce words correctly. Like nuclear. IT'S NUCLEAR, motherfucker. Not nucular.

I think I need another hug.

Posted by di at 12:49 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

Posted by di at 10:10 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

It's always the small things that make life so grand.

Posted by di at 03:15 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

As if you haven't heard that at all in the past few months, today's the day. Make sure you exercise your right to voice your opinion and vote!

I did! I voted blue in a notoriously red state. It feels good anyway.

Posted by di at 10:55 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

I just scheduled an appointment to have my hair cut tomorrow. A girlfriend of mine had hers cut like this today, and I've decided that 1) my hair is long enough that I can actually have it cut to look like this, 2) it would be nice to find a style that would allow me to enjoy some of the natural curl that currently drives me nuts, and 3) Ashley Judd is just too damn perfect. If she were fat or something, I'd probably like her a lot more than I do now. Because we all know that you can walk into a salon with a picture in hand and say, "Make my hair look like this!" but it doesn't necessarily mean that you'll walk out looking like that. I'd just settle for hair that is less flat, has more style and is easy to manage.

We'll see.

Posted by di at 03:09 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (2)

"Can you believe that instead of showing the The Bachelor on TV tonight that they are showing the presidential debate? I mean, come on! Who cares about the stupid debate?"

. . .

yes, because pseudo-reality tv is SO MUCH BETTER.

need. new. job.

Posted by di at 02:16 PM | Filed under: Random , Work |Permalink | Comments (1)

It seems that I have caught a cold that my daughter had last week, so all week I've been sniffling and sneezing and coughing and wheezing. It sucks to be plagued with an unusual amount of mucous (I had to look that word up because after typing mucus, mucuos and mucuous I realized that I had no clue and it probably would have been easier just to type "snot"...). But why am I talking about this anyway? Oh yeah, well the thing is, Jon and I are going to Maryland this weekend to attend the Maryland Renaissance Festival and I'm a bit peeved that I'm walking around with this virus in my system. I never get sick, but leave it to me to get sick the one time we decide to go out of town since this summer. Ugh.

I'm quite looking forward to the faire; it's been three years since we last went to the one in Maryland. Last time, we took his truck and stayed at a nearby KOA campground. Thing is, we didn't really have camping equipment, so we winged it and slept in the back of his truck on a makeshift bed made with a huge piece of cardboard (to cover the uneven bottom of the truck bed) and several thick quilts. Jon has a camper shell on his truck and had taken the extra time to seal it with a waterproof sealant in case it rained. And he even brought a heavy extension cord, some lights and a little fan so we could plug up to our AC outlet at the site and have electricity. It was all very contrived, but it worked out rather well, especially considering that it rained like hell the night we arrived. Boy did it rain. I remember lying in the back of his truck with a light on, both of us looking around for signs of leakage. And oh was there leakage. It made me giggle incessantly at how stupid we must have looked to the campers near us in their luxury RVs and such. But I doubt I would have remembered the trip as well had we not been camping in such a manner.

Continue reading "A Faire Weekend" »

Posted by di at 08:31 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

So I've finally managed (again) to get Moveable Type installed and up and running. Naturally, however, I don't like using the standard template and will hopefully in the next few days or week be changing the template and applying it to the site. There is so much that I don't yet understand about this system that I've read about and have seen in action; I figure I'll get there soon enough.

I'd like to add a picture or two on a regular basis, along with several different categories for different types of entries, including perhaps some of the older stuff from 1997-2003. I'd like for it to be less blog-like and more personal. I sometimes really miss the good ol' days before blogs. But hey, I guess I just need to go with the flow.

In the meantime, I'm back. And hopefully this time I'll stick around a little while longer.

Posted by di at 03:59 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink | Comments (1)

I moved in with Jon this weekend. It's scary and exciting and so far has been a lot of fun. We've started the process of merging our things and have been shopping for stuff for the house. I'm quite excited, though admittedly very tired and worn out.

I'll be moving things out of my house slowly, as I clean up and out and prepare my house to sell. I expect that the next couple of months of my life will be consumed with organizing and packing and moving things to and fro.

Also, I saw TORI (!!) this weekend! I had the best time at the concert last night. Ben Folds opened for her, and he was probably the best opening act I've ever seen. I was so giddy with excitement because our seats were 6th row center and they were terrific. I couldn't wait to see Tori, and when she took the stage, I couldn't believe how well I could see her. Not only could I see her fingers on the keys, but I could see her facial expressions. It was TERRIFIC! I'd rate it as the best Tori performance I've ever seen... and Jon was with me.. a first!

I'm so glad it's Labor Day weekend and I have tomorrow off, because I'm worn out. It's time for sleep... lots and lots of sleep...

Posted by di at 11:09 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

This is the first paper I submitted for my English class. I will be posting future papers here.

When I was young and people would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always answered with, �I want to be a writer.� My passion has always been writing. I have kept a journal of some sort since I was eleven or twelve years old, and I have discovered that putting my innermost thoughts onto paper and bearing witness to life�s experiences allows me to learn and grow as an individual. My writing charts my path, tells my secrets and guides the way for me.

I used to think there would be some magical point when I officially would become a writer: college graduation as I walked across the stage to receive my degree in journalism or perhaps the publishing of my first book. I have since learned otherwise. I never did receive that journalism degree, and I have yet to publish my first book. I am, however, a writer. The moment came and went without me realizing it had happened, but it certainly happened.

A year or so after I dropped out of college, I began work at a small weekly paper in the town where I was living. I was a staff and features writer, and I thoroughly enjoyed the writing process, from researching my stories to beating the newspaper�s publishing deadline with just a few minutes to spare. I learned a great deal about the people and places around me as well as the inner workings of city and county governments. I received a tremendous amount of personal satisfaction when people would stop me in the grocery store to compliment me or comment on something I had written. I was living my dream.

I have always had a fascination with the written word, and because of this fascination I have always been a voracious reader. When I was a child, I often could be found inside, curled up with a good book, helping Nancy Drew solve yet another mystery or reading the biography of some famous individual who interested me. As I grew older, my tastes changed, and I began to read the classics as instructed by my high school English teacher and even enjoyed some of the fiction my mother had purchased for herself. In recent years, Shakespeare and Danielle Steele have been shelved, and I have been reading all sorts of self-help manuals that promise to make me a better person, a better mother, a better eater, a better whatever. I decided not too long ago that it was time I become a better writer.

So, it is my hope that by taking Principles of Writing, I will do just that. It has been nearly eighteen years since I have written a paper for college, and the last paper I wrote resulted in a big fat red �C� on the paper and left me with a great amount of fear over the quality of my work. I am taking this course to face that fear, to learn the rules that will help me take my writing to the next level, and, of course, to turn that �C� into an �A�.

Posted by di at 08:35 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

I've learned a lot today, and I expect that I'll be updating the template for this website in the very near future. So much to do.. :-)

Posted by di at 04:06 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

oh, did i mention the fuck pages are now updated and online? i'm quite proud! if you care, be sure to check out the other stuff and donate to the cause! :-)

beware, bad words!!!

Posted by di at 10:47 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

i'm a slacker and haven't even downloaded the new pictures that were mentioned weeks ago. so lazy i am! but i'll get around to it eventually. really. and i may even take more pictures and download those too. i guess it's a bit more difficult to become motivated to that end when i never get on my desktop machine at home, but rather sit around with the laptop on a wireless connection and generally surf the web and do my ssh stuff.

i do find that i'm becoming more motivated, though. i have started to have strong yearnings to redesign and place my life on the web in a much grander way. and i find that when i see a really well designed personal website that i'm jealous and wonder why i'm such a slacker.

such is life. summer ticks on, and the damned rain continues to fall.

Posted by di at 10:21 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

there's one thing my mother told me years ago that has held true all these years:

IF IT HAS TIRES OR TESTICLES, IT'S GOING TO GIVE YOU TROUBLE.

Posted by di at 05:04 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

TORI! TICKETS!

I purchased four tickets today to tori's concert in raleigh on august 30. i only meant to purchase two, but i was just finishing up the initial order when jon said "I found two tickets for section 2, row F. that's center stage!! so i purchased those as well... HAD to have them. oh how i love tori. :-)

interested in buying some tickets? let me know.

Posted by di at 11:28 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

Come to me my melancholy baby
Cuddle up and don't be blue
All your fears are foolish fancy, maybe
You know, dear, that I'm in love with you;
Every cloud must have a silver lining
Wait until the sun shines through
So smile, my honey dear,
While I kiss away each tear
Or else I shall be melancholy too...

Posted by di at 08:24 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

what. the. fuck.

heh. i love the way that looks. it's my favorite phrase these days. and currently, i'm working on the interface to get those favorite phrases up and added dynamically.

i took some pictures this weekend. they are still sitting on the compact flash card in the camera. i'll get motivated to download them soon, i'm sure. maybe post them for the handful of people who know where to find them.

tomorrow is my last day at work this week. in order to be off friday i had to make up four hours in three days. not too hard to do, but tiring. i'll be glad to sleep in friday morning.

june is around the corner. i'm feeling a change in the air... are you?

Posted by di at 09:29 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

what is it that i want?

i desire one thing. presence. not the intrusion of humanity nor the emptiness of solitude but the feeling that i am not alone- that there is a source of external thought, sometimes discordant and others harmonious with my own. to be able to reach out and feel existence, substance and ghost. more than just positional presence or sexual gratification but the absence of absence. my one goal in life is presence. presence with someone i love who is at my side, not in front of me nor behind me but walking in a sidelong mutual embrace. i desire understanding yet i also desire to be questioned and proven wrong. i need to be with. i need to be beside. i need to interact. i don't need shades of grey, nor blinding whites or empty blacks. i exist for brilliant shades of color that mix with my own to create a palette of companionship and separated unity. presence.

thank you, harley, for the words you wrote so long ago that so adequately describe what it is that i'm looking for in this life.

Posted by di at 02:12 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGHHH!

I AM NOT HAPPY!

Posted by di at 09:11 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

i cleaned gutters, and bagged pine straw, and cleaned out my laundry room, went shopping, cleaned kitchen and did laundry...i stayed busy this past weekend.

i've been going to the doctor a lot lately.... seems i have a kidney stone, and i've had all sorts of issues related to and not-related to that. i believe it's all stress. today i went to the doctor and they found blood in my urine, so they ordered up an ivp be done of my kidney so they can find the stone and see how big it is. fun, fun. now i'm taking an antibiotic and walking around with a bottle of percocet just in case i have another attack of pain from the stone moving. and boy is there pain... it's worse than childbirth.

work is okay.. summer hours are about to begin, and this year we are rotating every other friday off, so i'll have five three-day weekends this summer. that starts the week of may 19.

lucky me, i'm going to miami this weekend for some much-needed relaxation. that also means that i'll have a four-day week this week since i'm taking friday off, and a four-day week next week since i'm taking monday off. so essentially, my four-day weeks for the summer have begun.. and they don't end til august 1.

:)

.....

pizza tonight for dinner. i started my period and just feel fat and lazy tonight. i also got my hair colored today- a darker brown that's close to my natural color... except that it ended up a ton darker than i had anticipated.

Posted by di at 08:43 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

i'm starting to make lists of things i want to get done around my house, things i want to get done at work, financial goals i have, organizing i want to accomplish.... it goes on and on. i realize all too often that i'm sitting around doing nothing about the mess that is my life. i want to be proud of bringing people to my house... but currently it lacks warmth and that inviting feeling. i'm trying to change that.

it's going to take time.. much like everything else these days. so the lists will be made, and me working towards something positive will start to take over.

it is spring, after all.

Posted by di at 08:57 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

life marches on.

it's amazing to me how the pain can become normal in the course of a couple of weeks, and how life continues to march on by. there are more subtle changes now in the way things are happening. i'm withdrawing, he's withdrawing, and we're both exploring life without the other. i never realized how painful it could be to feel someone i love slip away from me, but i understand fully now. it's still somewhat a shock to think that we're not together.

this is my reality now... and i find that the hope i hold onto about us getting back together is waning, and i'm becoming more realistic in my day to day approach to life. it really hurts to let go. it feels wrong, and unnatural, and foreign. are there more ways to describe the place i'm in now? i never imagined it would be like this. i guess i didn't think beyond where i was at the moment when i told him i couldn't foresee marrying him anymore. that was my reality then, and it still is... it's just that more realities have sunk in now about what that means exactly.

my body is stressed. i ache, and have pains.. and i don't feel as intoxicated with life as i did a few months ago. but that's ok.. i know that's normal ebb and flow stuff that will correct itself as time continues to tick past. i'm walking, i'm doing some yoga and some reiki, i'm really learning to listen to the emotions as they flow through me.

if you change one thing, it changes everything. it's something to remember when making big changes... and it's a lesson i'm learning well. you just gotta learn to hang on when the tides are moving in.

Posted by di at 09:13 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

wow! 2003 already! happy new year! how have you been?

as for updates.. let's see....

my insurance company totalled my car and sent me a check, which i promptly dropped into savings. i am now driving jon's truck - a ford ranger - and trying to determine what type of car to get in the near future. i've decided that since i haven't had a car payment in so long that i should probably try to put money in savings every month for the next 2-3 months to similate a car payment. this way i can make sure that i'm not over-extending my budget and that i don't run out and buy the first car that looks good.

in the meantime, i've dropped my insurance to liability only.. so my policy that was once $800/year for full coverage (i know, it's !@# insane!) is now $60/year for liability. that's easy on the wallet, and makes me feel good while i search for the replacement vehicle.

i loved my toyota. i almost cried the day i came home and they had towed it away to be salvaged for parts. i was getting 36/mpg on the highway and 30 or so around town.. and it was 7 years old! it was wonderful! because of this, i've considered getting another toyota.. maybe a corolla... maybe a camry.. i'm not really sure yet. then again, i really love the new volkswagens that are out these days (have you seen the cool blue dash lighting? omigod!). i guess i'm looking for a mid-size vehicle.. not too large, not too small. i want to make sure that i can travel to new york (or wherever) and not feel cramped and get good gas mileage, too.

i'd love to get a hybrid... i love the idea of 40-50 mpg around town! however, jon has convinced me that perhaps i should wait a few more years to see how the hybrids have made it and how they hold up over the years. he worries a bit about the maintenance issue (that of having to take it to the dealership only) and also wonders how long those cars last anyway. so i'll be waiting on that.

my dream car? a lexus. it's not out of the loop for consideration. it would have to be a used lexus, but pretty much any lexus would do. well, most any lexus. i like the newer models.. those from the past couple of years. however, i haven't priced those and they may be a bit out of my range.

jon and i are still planning to move in together at the end of may or beginning of june. he's been busy cleaning his house and making room for me and casey to move in. it's been quite interesting to see him sort through years of stockpiled computers and electronic components... he's a packrat! the process has helped him become more organized, so it's not a bad thing by any stretch of the imagination. we'll be crammed into that house no matter how much each of us organizes and throws away, but it's good to go through our stuff and figure out what's important.

moving means i'll be putting my house on the market, so i've been stressing a bit over getting some things taken care of prior to me moving. i figure the house will sell better if it's empty and vacant (in other words, if all my computers and shit aren't there), so i'm planning on giving myself an opportunity to paint and clean carpets and prepare it to sell during the month of june. i hope it sells quickly. i realize that it's not a seller's market now, but a 1550 sq. ft. house with 3BR, 2BA, formal living and dining rooms as well as a den, big kitchen and laundry room.. it should be appealing to someone. it also has a fenced in backyard with a basketball goal and is in walking distance to some nearby schools. i plan on pricing it to sell quickly.. so i break even on the mortgage. i'll probably go the "for sale by owner" route to avoid all the hefty realtor fees, but then again, who knows.

i'm also taking a class this semester at meredith.. psychology of gender roles. we just started classes yesterday, so i have the entire semester ahead of me. i found out that i have four projects to complete by mid-april. there is so much going on outside of this... jon's brother's wedding in mid-february in arizona that we are attending... the wedding of a good friend the following weekend here in raleigh.. a three-day conference in baltimore, md the following week. did i mention that i'm also taking aerobics on monday and wednesday nights and yoga on tuesday and thursday nights here at meredith (for free!)? i guess what i'm saying is that i really need to get organized and stay on top of things in order to reach all my goals. i figure if i can manage to get a couple of those projects knocked out in the next few weeks, i'll be feeling less stressed and will probably be more pleasant to be around.

last night, jon and i attended a climbing class at the Raleigh Rock Yard where we learned how to belay. it was quite fun and we plan on going back to climb their walls to get some practice. i was proud of myself last night for climbing to the top of one of the walls in the place. today, however, i ache like crazy (some of that is probably from the ab workout after aerobics the other night, too).

it's been a crazy 2003 so far!

Posted by di at 10:43 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

We had an ice storm here a couple of days ago that caused a tree to fall and land on my car! I think it will probably be totalled since the value of my car isn't all that much. argh!

Posted by di at 07:22 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

me and pearl jam... ahhh. some days i need some creativity to cheer me up!

Posted by di at 04:22 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

new tori amos cd today... and new nirvana, too! and new pearl jam in a couple of weeks.

i'm in heaven :)

Posted by di at 09:45 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

you know what they say...therapy is fantasy.

Posted by di at 04:20 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

good things are happening.

• scarlet's walk - the new tori amos cd due oct. 29
• new pearl jam cd, riot act, due november 12
• cornwall, england - november 15-22 - me, jon and another couple. i can't wait to see the english countryside, to have fish and chips, to drink at pubs and to generally just relax on another continent. yay for me!

Posted by di at 03:01 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

ahaha.. it's so funny, you've got to look! Use IE, if possible. It's an .asf file.

MasterCard

:-)

Posted by di at 09:59 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

it's monday. june 17. my mother's birthday.

so much is different now.

i'm divorced. i've resumed my maiden name, pickett. i'm currently dealing with the emotional aftermath of being married, and trying to keep pushing forward with my new life.

my office partner is currently running her space heater. i think it's 86 degrees outside. and people wonder why *i'm* weird? wtf is up with that?

Posted by di at 04:02 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

wow, it's so hard to believe that spring is here already. last time i remember checking, it was like january 2 or something. i've been doing well, though i haven't much felt like posting regular updates to my website. so much is going on that it's hard to keep up with what's what. i will mention that i filed for divorce a couple of weeks ago, so that will be finalized on may 9. classes end this week, so i've got my final exam next friday.. and a lot of studying to do before then. this weekend, jon and i are heading to the mountains to enjoy a nice relaxing weekend with some friends. i hope to get in good studying time there, as well as some good reading on the freud books i just received this weekend from amazon. then there's jon's birthday on the 1st. we've got tickets to go see fiddler on the roof at raleigh's memorial auditorium, and i'm quite excited about that, too. for his birthday i got him a customized shifter knob for his miata, based on what he told me he wanted. it will have the word "jdi" on it in the same font that mazda uses for the miata, along with the shifting pattern. it's already on its way to me as i type this, so hopefully i'll have it in a day or two and it'll be what i want (gratuitous linkage to knobmeister here). anyway, after the birthday is my exam, another weekend off, and jon and i have plans to do as little as possible. the divorce is the following week, and after that the only thing on the agenda is a beach trip. i hope to be posting pictures and more updates soon.

vacation, anyone?

Posted by di at 01:49 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

i'm alive. sorta. :-)

all you voyeurs should go look.

Posted by di at 04:22 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

today i found out i made a 98 on my first psychology test. highest grade in the class!

it's a good feeling to know that after 17 years away from any type of formal education that i can still bring home the grades.

:-)

Posted by di at 04:54 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

she's 34 and a mother of two children, both who still live at home. she works as a web programmer, but has lately felt uninspired by her job or the career path she seems to be on. she's taking a course at the college where she works so she can explore a bit and learn something along the way. she wants the happily ever after she once dreamed about, but she's not totally sure that her actions are pointing her to that dream.

you see, she's dating a man who wants something different than what she wants. although when together everything feels right and perfect, in reality it's not. he says it should be ok that he may want to occasionally have sex with another woman. she says that she can't envision herself being ok with that if and when the relationship warrants commitment. she knows that she wants true intimacy with a man who can return the love she gives. she also wants a man who shares the same values and who shares a common vision for the future.

the man she is in love with is in love with her as well. he strongly believes that any two individuals who comprise a relationship should always remain individuals. she believes that at some point, compromise is essential for the relationship to grow beyond the individuality of the two people involved and take on a new role in their lives.

they spend about 3-4 nights a week together. they have a great time and laugh a lot. they are genuine friends. rarely is there an argument, and their communication is never-ending about what's on their minds. they are honest about what they want and how they feel. both claim not to be ready for a committed relationship, though he often suggests that living together would be a way to spend more time together since their lives are busy otherwise.

because there is no commitment, she deals with the emotions of him sleeping with another woman as they arise. she can't envision the relationship strengthening or moving toward "more" with this going on, so she tries to be a friend to him at all times and take that perspective when looking at what they are doing together. she definitely loves him and wants to see him grow and share her perspective on what they could be. maybe then she'd consider living with him.

should she be focused on the fact that they lack the common vision of what they want long-term? or should they just be happy for the moment they are in, and make the decision to change things when they no longer feel happy with the moment?

tell me your opinion!

Posted by di at 02:25 PM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

it's already easy to see....

2002 is going to be good.

:)

Posted by di at 08:38 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

things i want for christmas (revised)

...general insight, caring and understanding of who i am from others, respect, the ability to make it through an evening without having an argument with my daughter, to have a closer relationship to both of my children, to determine the path i want to take in my relationship with jon, to have my kittens stop tearing up my house...

Posted by di at 08:46 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

oh yeah. got the cam. nothing great, but hey...

Posted by di at 11:19 AM | Filed under: Random |Permalink

quick inventory of words
quiet
alone